The brutality of the Truth,
The power that reality has,
Over ourselves.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Tomorrow, won't say Goodbye
Do you know what it is that we see?
That we experience? That we such get to enjoy?
The no stability, as we build out own castles,
As we mold, make, and remake,
Of what tomorrow will be ourselves,
We trip and fall
We walk away, and come back
But, it is out of our control.
The pain, of seeing our dreams, drive away,
Fly, crawl, ride, away, from our hands,
Our eyes, our touch, our souls.
The pain, of making millions of memories,
When tomorrow, they will be the end of us.
Building, and building,
So that tomorrow,
We, ourselves, destroy it,
With no control, whatsoever.
Don’t say hello to tomorrow,
If yesterday will destroy it.
Don’t say Hello, when inevitably,
Tomorrow, it’ll always be Good bye.
Is this what you are teaching me,
Is this what you wanted me to learn,
Is this what I know consider as a gift,
Is this what others wished for,
Is this what they truly desire
As I long, to stand still, on the crashing ocean waves,
How I wish that tomorrow, would be yesterday’s dream,
But as I wake up, then fall asleep,
I remember it won’t ever play the wrong way.
That we experience? That we such get to enjoy?
The no stability, as we build out own castles,
As we mold, make, and remake,
Of what tomorrow will be ourselves,
We trip and fall
We walk away, and come back
But, it is out of our control.
The pain, of seeing our dreams, drive away,
Fly, crawl, ride, away, from our hands,
Our eyes, our touch, our souls.
The pain, of making millions of memories,
When tomorrow, they will be the end of us.
Building, and building,
So that tomorrow,
We, ourselves, destroy it,
With no control, whatsoever.
Don’t say hello to tomorrow,
If yesterday will destroy it.
Don’t say Hello, when inevitably,
Tomorrow, it’ll always be Good bye.
Is this what you are teaching me,
Is this what you wanted me to learn,
Is this what I know consider as a gift,
Is this what others wished for,
Is this what they truly desire
As I long, to stand still, on the crashing ocean waves,
How I wish that tomorrow, would be yesterday’s dream,
But as I wake up, then fall asleep,
I remember it won’t ever play the wrong way.
Heart of a World
If for some reason, you don’t understand me,
In case you didn’t believe me.
I hung on your every word,
I followed you in my dreams,
Because, that is exactly where I wanted to be:
Holding hands with you,
Examining the future,
In more than many ways, molding ourselves,
To be ready, for this.
And here we are.
Don’t meet in dreams,
Don’t meet, together.
Where, you and I, Can run along,
Hand in hand, Heart, as One.
Where we always, played together.
You, are missing in me.
Your presence, begging to be Ours,
Mines, chocking in desperation,
Wanting you, and nothing else.
The oceans refuse to move,
Refuse to whisper stories,
Refuses to communicate,
Refuses to guard what’s rightfully his.
And here we are.
Don’t meet in thought,
Don’t meet with time,
Don’t meet with distance,
Don’t meet with the heavens above.
I, like our closest of friends,
Refuse to eat away the life, of our Brother,
I, like our closest friend,
Refuses to keep what, isn’t mines.
Roll along my friend, Roll along.
In case you didn’t believe me.
I hung on your every word,
I followed you in my dreams,
Because, that is exactly where I wanted to be:
Holding hands with you,
Examining the future,
In more than many ways, molding ourselves,
To be ready, for this.
And here we are.
Don’t meet in dreams,
Don’t meet, together.
Where, you and I, Can run along,
Hand in hand, Heart, as One.
Where we always, played together.
You, are missing in me.
Your presence, begging to be Ours,
Mines, chocking in desperation,
Wanting you, and nothing else.
The oceans refuse to move,
Refuse to whisper stories,
Refuses to communicate,
Refuses to guard what’s rightfully his.
And here we are.
Don’t meet in thought,
Don’t meet with time,
Don’t meet with distance,
Don’t meet with the heavens above.
I, like our closest of friends,
Refuse to eat away the life, of our Brother,
I, like our closest friend,
Refuses to keep what, isn’t mines.
Roll along my friend, Roll along.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Late Nights
Wednesday, December 2, 2009 at 2:25am (Original date)
I couldn't catch on to the irregularity of things. That as my heart was being torn, my pencil was running out of led. As you walked away, so did my sharpener. I couldn't decipher whether that meant to fight, or to just give up, whether to stand up or hang low at this disgrace. All I knew, was that I wanted you. All I know is that I want you. I want you, I want you, and I just simply want you. Do not shake your head at me, because maybe you're disappointed, that although I promised not to make you go through this again, here I am forcing you allow me to express my ways. you've held me back for too long, and I'm starting to believe this is bad for my health.
My hands are shaking.
They never really knew went to stop.
You held me against my own will, but. Something told me to fight, something has scared you off. Don't shake your head at me. You took everything from me, every word I used for expression, every rhyme for your admiration. I am fighting myself, as I fight you.and God only knows I am tired of fighting. I am tired of holding back the things I need to say, I am tired of stepping on stones because you're afraid of falling, because you're scared you'll drown. I dont want you to hold my hand anymore, JUST SET ME FREE! Let me live. Please just let me guide my way. I will not promise you anything. I wont promise you that things won't fall apart again, but I would rather try than to watch it all pass by.
Its some type of transition.
I NEVER WANT TO STOP.
I dont want to stop. I never wanted to. You are my addiction. My problems, my conflictions. And God forbid I FALL. But if I FALL PLEASE let me drown. Let me drown in every inch of you, let me drown in your thoughts, your dreams, let me drown in your soul. Or simply, in your lips.
I am going for a ride.
Next stop, coming up.
Your lips, Oh the sweet taste of your lips. Blessed are your lips. And the secrets they hold. I DONT WANT TO KNOW. I dont want to choose the way, I dont want right, I dont want left, I just want to ride. Just take me, Do you not understand me? I SCREAM. I am yelling for you, inside, There is a STORM. Its a tsunami. Let me write you down my name, sing you a song, of butterflies, and flowers, and trees, YOUR LIPS. (sigh) who am I fooling! I am a fool. living a foolish life. foolish rules. that for one reason or another, disable me, from telling you.
the things.
on my mind.
When I close my eyes. You're sitting here. Listening, intently. as I tell you that this is real. That I feel the surreal, but it is real. that this is real. that us is real. when I close my eyes, alot of things change. you're here....with me. and hold, just hold me. then I open them, and she's sitting there with me. My friend, reality.
I couldn't catch on to the irregularity of things. That as my heart was being torn, my pencil was running out of led. As you walked away, so did my sharpener. I couldn't decipher whether that meant to fight, or to just give up, whether to stand up or hang low at this disgrace. All I knew, was that I wanted you. All I know is that I want you. I want you, I want you, and I just simply want you. Do not shake your head at me, because maybe you're disappointed, that although I promised not to make you go through this again, here I am forcing you allow me to express my ways. you've held me back for too long, and I'm starting to believe this is bad for my health.
My hands are shaking.
They never really knew went to stop.
You held me against my own will, but. Something told me to fight, something has scared you off. Don't shake your head at me. You took everything from me, every word I used for expression, every rhyme for your admiration. I am fighting myself, as I fight you.and God only knows I am tired of fighting. I am tired of holding back the things I need to say, I am tired of stepping on stones because you're afraid of falling, because you're scared you'll drown. I dont want you to hold my hand anymore, JUST SET ME FREE! Let me live. Please just let me guide my way. I will not promise you anything. I wont promise you that things won't fall apart again, but I would rather try than to watch it all pass by.
Its some type of transition.
I NEVER WANT TO STOP.
I dont want to stop. I never wanted to. You are my addiction. My problems, my conflictions. And God forbid I FALL. But if I FALL PLEASE let me drown. Let me drown in every inch of you, let me drown in your thoughts, your dreams, let me drown in your soul. Or simply, in your lips.
I am going for a ride.
Next stop, coming up.
Your lips, Oh the sweet taste of your lips. Blessed are your lips. And the secrets they hold. I DONT WANT TO KNOW. I dont want to choose the way, I dont want right, I dont want left, I just want to ride. Just take me, Do you not understand me? I SCREAM. I am yelling for you, inside, There is a STORM. Its a tsunami. Let me write you down my name, sing you a song, of butterflies, and flowers, and trees, YOUR LIPS. (sigh) who am I fooling! I am a fool. living a foolish life. foolish rules. that for one reason or another, disable me, from telling you.
the things.
on my mind.
When I close my eyes. You're sitting here. Listening, intently. as I tell you that this is real. That I feel the surreal, but it is real. that this is real. that us is real. when I close my eyes, alot of things change. you're here....with me. and hold, just hold me. then I open them, and she's sitting there with me. My friend, reality.
Friday, January 1, 2010
1/1/10
Today is the first day of the year Twenty-Ten.
On Friday the 1st of January of the year 2010 at 7:46 am, Zuri Gutierrez was born. The most beautiful baby in the world, at 20 inches, this 8 lbs blessing came to us. I cannot wait to meet you linda! I hope that you enjoyed your first day in this World. May God bless you with the best of life's gifts, family, friends, and a whole lotta love. Te Quiero Demasiado linda! The most amazing thing that could happen to any of us.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
My Inner Thoughts
I wanna be fancy, no, not too fancy
Just enough to be noticed.
I want a million friends
scratch, rewind, erase that
I want friends, true, loyal,
and unkindhearted friends.
I wanna sing, dance, jump, skip,
but not be overpowered by influence.
I wanna be loved, oh yes, so loved,
loved biq, loved small,
in bunches, in tinys,
liked, adored, querida,
and the whole package!
I wanna laugh at those
that wanna be me,
because they can copy and trace
but never take my place.
I wanna sit outside at night
and watch the twinkling stars
as they make their way across the sky.
I wanna cry during the happy moments
and smile during the sad.
I wanna real strong,
strong enough to hold the world
and all it's passengers.
I wanna swim from one ocean to another,
taste the difference between them.
I wanna write poems that
move people's lives,
to remember me and my lines.
I wanna share an intimacy with a golden boy
one with nice eyes, pretty smile,
and an attitude that's wild.
I want a little piece of Heaven,
just to hold it in my hand.
I wanna meet time,
see where she goes while we dream.
I wanna climb the highest mountain,
and pick out the bad seeds of the Earth.
I wanna be like Santa Claus,
a reason for all kids to be happy.
I wanna play a game of basketball
with the legend Michael Jordan,
ask him how it feels to swish all his baskets.
I wanna talk to God,
see if he ever dreams of a wife,
sorry, didnt mean to be nosy,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna
I just wanna write a song,
I just wanna write a story,
I just wanna write a poem,
that will change somebody's life.
Just enough to be noticed.
I want a million friends
scratch, rewind, erase that
I want friends, true, loyal,
and unkindhearted friends.
I wanna sing, dance, jump, skip,
but not be overpowered by influence.
I wanna be loved, oh yes, so loved,
loved biq, loved small,
in bunches, in tinys,
liked, adored, querida,
and the whole package!
I wanna laugh at those
that wanna be me,
because they can copy and trace
but never take my place.
I wanna sit outside at night
and watch the twinkling stars
as they make their way across the sky.
I wanna cry during the happy moments
and smile during the sad.
I wanna real strong,
strong enough to hold the world
and all it's passengers.
I wanna swim from one ocean to another,
taste the difference between them.
I wanna write poems that
move people's lives,
to remember me and my lines.
I wanna share an intimacy with a golden boy
one with nice eyes, pretty smile,
and an attitude that's wild.
I want a little piece of Heaven,
just to hold it in my hand.
I wanna meet time,
see where she goes while we dream.
I wanna climb the highest mountain,
and pick out the bad seeds of the Earth.
I wanna be like Santa Claus,
a reason for all kids to be happy.
I wanna play a game of basketball
with the legend Michael Jordan,
ask him how it feels to swish all his baskets.
I wanna talk to God,
see if he ever dreams of a wife,
sorry, didnt mean to be nosy,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna
I just wanna write a song,
I just wanna write a story,
I just wanna write a poem,
that will change somebody's life.
Everlasting Rollercoaster Ride
Yeah, he makes me happy
no, I'm sorry
he makes me really happy,
like when he came around,
my face would light up,
my hands would start shaking,
my heart would skip a beat,
whatever that means.
Anyhow,
we would spend countless hours together
playing basketball
buying things,
watchinq movies,
making a scene,
it was just . . . amazing.
Until one day,
we realized our differences,
we took a look at our flaws,
from that day on,
our relationship changed completely.
we fought, argued,
yelled, threw thinqs,
I thought it was definately
the end of something good
but I tell you,
Boy kept pushing and pushing
till my back was against a wall,
and at that moment
our relationship changed once aqain.
I started seeing things from his perspective,
i began to understand his physical language,
and man Oh man
did I beqin to love him.
Now this time when he came around,
I fought back my tears,
I wanted him to go away,
I didnt want him to leave,
I wanted him to shut up
and just hold me
but NO, it wasnt really about me,
well I mean, I guess it wasnt about me.
ugh he talked when i wanted silence,
touched me when I just wanted to be alone,
I kinda imagined I had made the biggest mistake of my life.
Guess what happened then?
yeah, my feelings changed once aqain,
as if God had tightened up some screws,
as if the Opthomologist had added strenqgh to my glasses,
as if a faceless force had enliqhtened me
I felt guilt, I felt regret,
and I felt stupid.
Month after month
we tried to make it work,
excuse me, HE tried to make it work,
puttinq his all into it,
And me?
Oh please, I had better things to worry about,
really couldn't have cared less,
he was younger than me anyway.
And so came the tears aqain,
but these werent quite so spontaneous,
this weren't sad or mad tears,
these were tears that made me realize
that honestly. . .how could i live without this guy?
Yeah when I say he gave me everything,
I'm not frontin',
he gave me tears, he gave me pain
he gave me motivation, he gave me smiles
he gave me anger, he gave me strife
So thats our story,
the one I hate the most,
but yet. . . the one I love the most,
because even though we fuss and fight
we're taking our never ending rollercoaster ride.
no, I'm sorry
he makes me really happy,
like when he came around,
my face would light up,
my hands would start shaking,
my heart would skip a beat,
whatever that means.
Anyhow,
we would spend countless hours together
playing basketball
buying things,
watchinq movies,
making a scene,
it was just . . . amazing.
Until one day,
we realized our differences,
we took a look at our flaws,
from that day on,
our relationship changed completely.
we fought, argued,
yelled, threw thinqs,
I thought it was definately
the end of something good
but I tell you,
Boy kept pushing and pushing
till my back was against a wall,
and at that moment
our relationship changed once aqain.
I started seeing things from his perspective,
i began to understand his physical language,
and man Oh man
did I beqin to love him.
Now this time when he came around,
I fought back my tears,
I wanted him to go away,
I didnt want him to leave,
I wanted him to shut up
and just hold me
but NO, it wasnt really about me,
well I mean, I guess it wasnt about me.
ugh he talked when i wanted silence,
touched me when I just wanted to be alone,
I kinda imagined I had made the biggest mistake of my life.
Guess what happened then?
yeah, my feelings changed once aqain,
as if God had tightened up some screws,
as if the Opthomologist had added strenqgh to my glasses,
as if a faceless force had enliqhtened me
I felt guilt, I felt regret,
and I felt stupid.
Month after month
we tried to make it work,
excuse me, HE tried to make it work,
puttinq his all into it,
And me?
Oh please, I had better things to worry about,
really couldn't have cared less,
he was younger than me anyway.
And so came the tears aqain,
but these werent quite so spontaneous,
this weren't sad or mad tears,
these were tears that made me realize
that honestly. . .how could i live without this guy?
Yeah when I say he gave me everything,
I'm not frontin',
he gave me tears, he gave me pain
he gave me motivation, he gave me smiles
he gave me anger, he gave me strife
So thats our story,
the one I hate the most,
but yet. . . the one I love the most,
because even though we fuss and fight
we're taking our never ending rollercoaster ride.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)